There is a modern revolution happening around us. Some of us have witnessed this first hand; others have only barley glimpsed the future.  Dan knew it was his future and he wanted to grab it by the icing sugar and get his gum tragacanth on.

While he was out working in the jungle for the development of a larger shopping mall, he noticed a tree. A tree which didn’t belong in the South American rain forest, he knew this, as he had recently undertaken Middle Eastern Studies as an evening class at his local college.

The Goat’s Thorn was not indigenous to these parts. Dan wondered what it was doing here, and how was it able to survive in the humid conditions. All of a sudden he heard “Get away from my tree… That MY tree I made it” . An elderly woman appeared from behind a bush, covered in flour and icing sugar.

“Oh you are… erhmmm.wanna piece of cake?” she said in a thick West Country accent. Dan looked confused but intrigued. “Well ok?” He said with a hint of confusion and blue.

The women pulled back another bush to reveal 4 yurts in a circle. Each had a name above it. The first said Kitchen, the second said Bedroom, the third said lounge and the fourth, well the fourth was an odd one. The writing was so small Dan couldn’t read it until; he was within a few centimeters.

“This is the part of the camp that no one must be allowed to enter as here the god will shine down on us and keep us protected from those who do not believe in her and that she will always be the only god I will worship because even if I have to keep a room free just for her in case she wants to visit me one day and I know she does as I feel her love where ever I go and not just in my baking but in the way I will go to a shop and see a bargain and there will be one left and I will get that one bargain thus proving to me that she is real and will always protect me from those around me who might want to harm me for my baking skills because I am a legend in these parts which is not hard as I am the only baker to have ever lived in the jungle and she will make sure this is always the case”

By the time Dan had read this he was presented with a slice of cake. “Don’t worry deery, it’s a mango and chocolate tortoise cake… the secret ingredient is not tortoise… Its Elephant bug” Dan looked at the lady waiting for a hint she was being sarcastic, but it never came. He closed his eyes and took a bite.

It was not bad; it had the right elements to be a great cake, soft and moist with a warm loving texture that was like a fresh pair of pants being placed on your head. The only issue was the weird after taste. It made his tongue feel all downy.  It was as if the cake contained some sort of drug.

He continued to munch his way through the cake; despite his tongue starting to swell it had an addictive quality to it. “What is in this, it’s amazing?” The lady didn’t say a word and continued to watch him eat the cake. He was on his 4th piece when he suddenly stopped. “What am I doing? I have a job to do!?! I am sorry to bother you; I must get back to work!”

He stood up and thanked the lady. He felt dizzy after his meal but at the same time felt like he could take on a whole army and win. His uneasiness started to grow, something was niggling him at the back of his massive mind. He looked at his phone to check for messages.

The next thing he can remember is sitting in his car at home looking at the same phone. It was flashing with one email from himself “Rain forests make rubbish places to build shopping malls, I QUIT!” he blinked his eyes and scratched his head. This email was sent to the head of his department.

He was in shock. What have I done, how did I do this, when did I do this. It was then he noticed on the passenger seat next to him was a box of cupcakes, with a note on it

Cake Box

To Dan,
I hope you enjoy these exceptional Swirls Bakery cupcakes; I had them made especially for you with my extraordinary ingredient. Maybe it’s time you followed your dream

On the reverse of the note was an ingredients list and recipe on how to make the cupcakes. Dan smiled and took a bite of a cake. “Here we go again!!!”

Categories: Stories


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