Being just 7 and working for a bank was a daunting task for Scott. He loved that he was able to go to work and earn his keep. E had worried ever since his mum had been unable to work. She found out what photosynthesis was one day and the mental trauma has given her nightmares and hives.

So here was Scott, working for an international venture capital bank and was in charge of millions of pounds worth of investments. He never thought he’d get the job bring just 7 years old, but luck and fait played their part.

Back when he was 5, he decided he wanted to be a banker. This was at odds with his class mates who wanted to be in the police, train drivers, one even wanted to be a Bus. Not a bus driver, but a bus. He said he liked that people would get inside him.

Scott worked hard every day reading tax law. He knew the tax system inside out by the time he was 6. He understood numbers better than anyone. He wrote to the bank on his 7 th birthday saying they could save millions of pounds a year with a simple trick. He didn’t tell them what the trick was but it peaked their interest.

Next thing he knows he’s in London meeting the CEO of IBOC, the world famous venture capitalist bank. This was a dream come true for the lad from Grimsby. He was lead into a room and told to wait for the CEO to arrive. He sat down in a large leather chair, which swapped him. He waited patiently.

After around 20 minutes the large door to the side of him swung open and he was asked to come in. He entered the board room which was filled with the greedy and the bad. He was shocked to see at the head of the table a goat with a bowler hat on. The goat looked at him “So you can save us money then boy?” Scott nodded as he looked along the table. He began to recognise other farm animals.


The pig, oniked, “So how is a human going to save us money?” Scott looked at the pre-bacon being “Have you heard of Gutter Law?”. The pig said nothing. He raised his trotter and pointed at the cow. The cow had the biggest chair in the room and it was plain odd to see it sitting on its arse. Front Legs resting on the table.

The cow frowned “Yes, you think that will save us money 1 stomach, I have looked into this and I see no way it can!” Scott looked amused, “So you looked at section 4 part 9 the Hole Punch debate?” The cow tapped on his iPad, scrolling through what Scott could only presume was the gutter law files.

“I see it here. I have looked at this and dismissed it as it was not linked to any business activity we currently undertake”. The cow mooed.

“That’s the key” said Scott. “Your factory in Ting Tong, they can make the required parts!” The cow smiled… The rest of the board had no idea what was going on, “Boy, you have indeed a smart a brain as us…. welcome aboard” The goat seemed shocked. “Cow, you can’t just employ him?”

“I can when he’s saved the company” the cow taps the iPad again “£4.9 million”

“Oh” said the goat, “you are telling me this human beat our experts in the abattoirs up and down the country? Wow… A clever human” Scott was thrilled to have been accepted by the board. “I have one question though” said the Goose? Do you eat meat?

Categories: Stories


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